Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Break up-The stages of the “Breaker”

Who ever initiate a break-up goes through different stages, or feelings, afterwards. It’s never easy to let someone go and it’s interesting to see the changes inside of a person after such event happens. I've identified the following (does not necessary happen in a sequence):

Relief: If nothing is stopping it, a relationship usually slowly deteriorates before the breaker ends it. Due to the week/months of tension prior to the break-up, there’s a sentiment of relief and freedom that takes over soon after it ends.

Confused: This stage usually follows the relief. The confused individual doesn’t know if breaking up was a good idea. They don’t want to hurt the other person and they like having that person around still. They still meet and stay in contact.

Indifferent/Acceptance: This stage usually follows the confused stage. This is where they feel they made the right decision by letting the other person go. They don’t feel anything (maybe friendship) at this point and they couldn’t care less what the other person does with their lives. This is where they start to loose contact. They moved on.

Hate: It occurs when the breakup was due to treason or other harsh experience. It could potentially follow the indifferent stage if the “ex” is trying hard to get attention or get back together. The person, who initiated the break-up, has not only moved on but also avoid the ex when ever possible.

If you’ve been through a break up, you may be able to relate with one of the step above. If it’s different, let me know and I’ll consider changing/adding the list. :)

**Special thanks to Chantal for her help with this.

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