Friday, May 27, 2011

Living with urgency - Tomorrow isn’t Promised

If it’s not now then when? If it’s not done now, what are the chance that we’ll be able to do it at another time? Something else will come up, or our time on this earth will end.

We don’t have 1000 years. We barely can make it through 100. No more procrastination! If something needs to be done, it needs to be done now.

We can learn from the pass and the pass is done. The future can be planed but the future is not upon us yet. The “NOW” is all we got. We’ll never see this moment again, ever.

We have one chance, give it all you got.

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Lying Less Starts With You

If we are the one person we love the most in the world and we sometime lie to ourselves. Why wouldn't we lie to other people?

Telling ourselves we’re going to do something and we end up not doing it is a lie that, over time, affect how we see ourselves. We’re not stupid, we will end up not believing ourselves and it will make us feel like a looser.

It’s a simple fix but not an easy one. We just have to commit to what we say. We have to become people of integrity. It all begins with the small decisions.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Sex isn’t Everything BUT...

Many will argue that sex isn’t everything in a relationship. Sex is a good way to know if the relationship is on track or not. When sex is less frequent, it may be because of one of the following:
  1. Don’t like sex - Sex, to some people, may be a reminder of bad experiences or they just don’t like the feeling (the prior is more common though).
  2. Too repetitive/not exciting - We’re creature of habits and sex tends to become more of a habit, in the long run, than something exciting. Sex should be more than just a release. Let your imagination run wild. Trying new things is the best way to know if you’re going to like it or not.
  3. Relationship Issue that needs fixing - Relationships comes with it’s own set of problems. It’s impossible to have a perfect relationship, it’s something that should be constantly worked on. A relationship is something that you do and not something that you have. The problem is often not with your partner, it’s how you see your partner. Life is not about finding the perfect person. It’s about learning to love an imperfect person perfectly. Every situation is different. Communication is key.
  4. The sex isn’t good - If you and your partner just don’t connect sexually then logically it won’t happen often. More on this bellow.
When the sex isn’t good you can ...
  1. Tell - Everyone likes different things, by letting your partner know what you like, the sex will become better. Practice makes perfect, give your partner lessons on how to pleasure you and how you can pleasure your partner.
  2. Endure - I love sex too much to endure it. However, I may do things that I don’t necessary like just because I know my partner does.
  3. Take control - If you’re afraid of telling your partner, taking control may help your partner figure out what you like.
  4. Change partner - If the sex ain’t good, the connection will gradually deteriorate to the point where you’ll want to leave to experience different things. I do recommend on working on it rather than changing partners.
For more on this … well just look online. It’s really hard not to come across a site for adults these days. “Studying” those site may help you find new things to try.

Friday, May 20, 2011

Being Attractive is Important in a Relationship

One of my biggest flaws was that I would stop caring about myself, physically, once it would get comfortable in a relationship.

Some will argue that the appearance isn’t everything and I now find it’s only partly true. Being ugly or pretty isn’t what’s important. It’s taking care of ourselves that is. Things like grooming, good clothing, good health/fitness. Things that will make us feel attractive.

If you go to the mall with your partner. How will your partner feel if you get a “your attractive” comment? Your partner will feel better than if you got told “what’s that thing” I can guarantee it.
Being physically attracted to each other also adds up to the pleasure when things gets intimate. How you feel about yourself shows the most in those moments and can help raise the passion.

What do you do to feel attractive?

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Good goes Unnoticed

Have you ever felt like the good you do to people often go unnoticed? Why is it so often overlooked? Why does the good that people do to you goes unnoticed?

My belief is that people have different ways to do good to other people and they’re often blinded to ways that isn’t their own. Maybe doing good for you means to clean the house or maybe it’s giving compliments and smiling or maybe it’s something else!

It’s important to do good anyway, not only is it the right thing to do; doing good is like adding water to a glass, eventually it will overflow and the person will finally notice the mess on the table.
Sometimes, little hints like “Have you noticed I did the dishes today?” can help them find and appreciate the good you do.

I’m aware that there’s some people out there that are just blinded by negative and can’t see any good things. The people who deserves it the least often needs it the most.

Do good things :)

Friday, May 13, 2011

Bill Clinton - Economy

On Wednesday, May 11 2011, in Fredericton N.-B., I got the opportunity to attend Bill Clinton’s talk about the economy. Here’s a brief resume of what he covered.

Part of Bill Clinton’s talk was about how to help poor Countries develop a good economy. He said that while donation helps, it doesn’t fix the problem. He believes that systems needs to be in place to reward good conduct in order to create a good economy and that donation should go to support those systems rather than directly to the poor.
He then went on to talk about his Clinton administration and how they build a Mortgage system in Haiti to help people buy homes.

Bin laden’s death was mentioned in his speech and at the end during the Q&A. His thoughts were that it was hard for him to be happy about it since a lot of people suffered because of him.

He also elaborated on the reason why Canada weathered the recent global economic meltdown. He said that the Country’s lending institutions regulated their business practices, avoiding high-risk derivatives and risky mortgages, unlike their U.S. counterparts.

Special thanks to Kan Liu and Nathan Langton for their input and links.

The system - Teenage rebel

In my late teenage years, I used to prefer black over other colors because it felt “different” and “rebel”ish. I would wear black leather bracelet with black long hair, black jacket … black... black

I used to think that by doing so I was “fighting the system”. Little did I know that not only was I not, I was encouraging it. There’s people out there that spend their lives studying communities, or trends, and I was just part of the “rebel want to be” group. They studied people like me and created items that would peaked my interest in order to get my money (or my parents money).

How can it be called “rebelling” against the system when all of it is anticipated and welcomed. The “rebelling” was but an illusion.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Happy 117th Birthday Martha Graham

If you’ve been to google today, you’ll notice that it’s logo is different today (quite good actually). Today is the 117 birthday of Martha Graham, a well known dancer.

I never heard that name before today, nor knew her story. I went to Wikipedia to read about it and I found it to be very interesting. The bellow is something she once said to a friend. I thought it was powerful enough for me to share.

"It wasn't until years after I had relinquished a ballet that I could bear to watch someone else dance it. I believe in never looking back, never indulging in nostalgia, or reminiscing. Yet how can you avoid it when you look on stage and see a dancer made up to look as you did thirty years ago, dancing a ballet you created with someone you were then deeply in love with, your husband? I think that is a circle of hell Dante omitted.

[When I stopped dancing] I had lost my will to live. I stayed home alone, ate very little, and drank too much and brooded. My face was ruined, and people say I looked odd, which I agreed with. Finally my system just gave in. I was in the hospital for a long time, much of it in a coma.” - Martha Graham


LETTING GO! - Self Analysis

It’s by far the hardest thing I ever did. It hurt so much that it feels like I’m drinking poison every morning followed by a slap to the face.

What is so wrong with me that I can’t make a relationship work? Am I too caring? Do I use chivalry enough? Am I not attractive enough? Am I not a good listener? Am I not funny? Am I not honest? Do I love enough? Am I passionate enough? Am I romantic enough?

Why is being myself not working!

I know that relationships is something that needs to be worked on daily. I’m so sick of having to fight for the very survival of it. I can’t pass that stage! I give it my all to put wood in the fire and next thing I know, I’m the only one working.

It wasn’t enough. I don’t regret doing it, I just don’t understand! What did I missed! Where did I fail. If it’s something I did wrong, I have to figure it out so that I can work on it!

I’m not a desperate man, I can have any woman I want. When I find a good one, I sure give myself a lot of trouble to make them feel like princesses. Even if it seems to go unnoticed at times.

"If there is a way to do it better ... find it."-Thomas Edison

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Fail your way to success

You only fail when you don’t learn the lessons from your losses. A successful person is not someone who never fails. He’s failing more often than anyone else but he learns from it.

Quitting is the opposite of success. Failure is require to ever achieve success. If you don’t know how to do the wrong things, how are we ever going to find how to do it right? If you stop doing it half way, you’ll never achieve success.

We shouldn’t be afraid to fail, we should anticipate it, learn from it, and move forward until we succeed.

Monday, May 9, 2011

There’s love for everyone!

Do I believe in love? Absolutely! Do I believe in love at first sight? Of course! Do I believe that love last forever? No.

Love, like happiness, is a feeling that comes and goes. After it’s gone, it takes a decision to stick around and work before it comes back. Most of the time, that’s when relationship ends. They don’t believe that it will ever come back. In a way, they’re right since they don’t give it a chance.

In the past, I often mistaken lust for love and I can clearly see the difference between the two now. It’s a matter of how you see the other person.

Lust is like a junkie that needs his fix. He’s just nice in order to get sex. Love, on the other hand, is a deep desire to care about the other person. It’s feeling a bit sick when that person is not around.
Lust brings short term pleasure while love brings lasting happiness. Lust is planting seeds and not caring for them while love is planting a seed and help it grow into a big apple tree.

In a relationship, you show you care for the other person by caring about yourself too.

Friday, May 6, 2011

Living Life with a Learning System

We only live once and we’ll be doing mistakes our entire life. The lessons, in life, are repeated until they’re learned. It can be hard to find things to learn form in our mistakes.

It takes knowledge to know where to look for the lessons. After reading some good self-help books, I can look back at my past mistakes and pin point my wrongs to fix them for a better future.

Some things I read, I could learn on my own with time and the right experiences but I don’t have time to wait for it to happen. It’s always better to learn from someone else’s mistake than your own.

I’ve been following a leadership system for the past 4 years now and I can’t help but wonder where I would be today without it. The biggest lesson I learned was that I’m an idiot and it’s more evident the more I read. There’s a lot of things that I don’t know and wouldn’t have learned without the help of leadership cds/books.

Find yourself a system to learn from.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Not voting was a vote for conservative by default

If you didn’t vote and complain about the current conservative majority, in Canada, know that you have no right for doing so. You voted for them. You’re complaining about something you actively help doing.

Why was it defaulted to conservative? It’s defaulted to who ever was majority in the last elections. They figure that if you didn’t have any problems with them in the past, you won’t have any problems with them in the future.

Don’t like Conservative? Vote for someone else next time!

I’m not blue, nor am I red. I’m CANADIAN.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

The Enemy is the Government?

Too often the government is seen as the enemy. While it's true that there's been some mistakes, the government is here to represent and serve us.

“You can’t change a Country by changing it’s government. You change a Country by changing the thinking of it’s people.” -unknown

Why is it that when ever something is not going our way we instantly point fingers towards the government? Every time we do, the government will do it (they represent us and want to be re-elected) but all those things cost money and where does that money come from? Our pockets!

Then we wonder why there’s so many different taxes, why the price of gas is so high, why our money is worth next to nothing (inflation). Why, why why?

Who do we blame again? The government! The problem is us, Canadian citizens, for being blind to the simple truth. WE control this Country and WE decide where it’s heading and the government is just helping us get there. The problem is that WE, the population, doesn’t have a clue about what WE want.


Due to this, what we need is a government that will NOT listen to the population! What we need is a government that will lead this country using the core principles that made CANADA great in the first place.

I’m not red, i’m not blue, I’M CANADIAN!

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Varied Interest

For the pass 4 years I’ve been studying nothing else but leadership. There’s always things to learn on the matter and, although I came a long way, I still have lots to learn.

I found out that the more I was learning about it the less connected I seem to be with everyone else. Why? Because no one else is passionate about it as much as I am.

Ironically, the most important part of leadership is relationship you get with people and you can only connect with people with the same interest as you. I’m not talking about being an expert in every field but to know a bit from most of them so that you can talk about it with someone who’s passionate in one of them.

I still read about leadership on a daily basis but I also added a book on psychology, started focusing on art more (which I like) and reading various articles on Wikipedia. I ordered 2 books on martial arts that I’m anxious to get and I now go out of my way to speak to someone new.
All the above will, I’m sure, help me to connect with more people. What interest do you have?

Monday, May 2, 2011

Paying Attention with Art

When is the lat time you ever truly looked at a cloud? Or at a tree? There’s so many of them that often we just take them for granted.

To get a more constructive hobby than video games, I recently got my pencils and scrapbook out to get back into drawing which made me look around for things to draw.

I never noticed the amount of details, or colors, a cloud had. They never really mattered until I had to draw them which made me realized that I never really analyzed anything before. If I missed the details of the clouds, what else could i have missed over the years?

I’m always in a hurry to get things done and drawing forces me to stop to appreciate the simple things. It forces me to pay attention.
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