Relationships are Like Trees

Relationships are like trees. Have you ever saw two trees grown into one another? The spots where the trees touches could be translated to arguments within the relationship. It could of been painful at the time but in the end, it made the tree merge together even more.

Cut one of those trees and both of them will die.

Souls on fire with Attitude & Expectations

There’s a study that comes up in almost every book I read on Attitude. It’s a study made by Harvard psychologist Robert Rosenthal and San Francisco school principle Lenore Jacobson.

The study:

“...They [Robert Rosenthal/ Lenore Jacobson] asked the question: Do some children perform poorly in school because their teachers expect them to? If so, they surmised, raising the teacher’s expectations should raise the children performances as well. So a group of kindergarten through fifth-grade pupils was given a learning ability test and the next fall the new teachers were casually given the names of five or six children in the new class who were designated as “spurters” ; the test supposedly revealed that they had exceptional learning ability.
What the teachers did not know was that the test results had been rigged and that the names of these “spurters” had been chosen entirely at random. At the end of the school year, all the children were retested with some astonishing results. The pupils whom the teachers thought had most potential had actually scored far ahead, and had gained as many as 15 to 27 I.Q. points. The teachers described these children as happier, more curious, more affectionate than average, and having a better chance of success in later life. The only change for the year was the change in attitudes of the teachers. Because they had been led to expect more of certain students, those children came to expect more of themselves. “The explanation probably lies in the subtle interaction between teacher and pupils,” speculates Rosenthal. “Tone of voice, facial expressions, touch and posture may be the means by which often unwittingly-teachers communicate their expectations to their pupils. Such communication may help a child by changing his perceptions of himself.”

-Page 32/33 of “Bringing out the best in people” book by author Alan Loy Mcginnis

The study suggest that your expectation determines your attitude towards that person. Expectations can either bring the best out of people or the worse out of them. Expect the good out of everybody.

You Make 3 to 4 Time What They Pay You

When ever a company does business with a client, who ever works on the project is being paid half (in most cases) of what the company charges the client. Which means that if you’re paid 30 000 a year to do a job, the company who hired you makes 60 000 a year on you.

If a client invest 60 000 on you … don’t you think he expects to make a lot more out of the work you’re doing?

Wrong definition of Mastery of Self

I read something recently that made me re-think my philosophy on feelings and the mastery of self. I used to believe that Mastery of Self meant to control how we feel, which implied not only suppressing feelings on the spot but creating new ones as well.

Chuck Goetschel in his “Simon Says” book stated:

“...Part of the process of discovering your Life Purpose has to do with being in touch with your feelings. Your feelings are clue to what your life purpose is all about. By noticing how you feel about things, you’ll discover what you value and what you don’t. Things that don’t trigger much emotion probably aren’t tied to your purpose or the application of it - at least for now....”

If there would be a way for us to control our feelings, we would never discover our life purpose. The Mastery of Self isn’t about controlling our feelings, it’s about controlling our actions. Doing things because it’s the right thing to do despite of how we feel about it. We go to the gym even if we don’t feel like it because it’s the right thing to do. We eat a salad instead of a pizza because it’s the right thing to do …

Simply put, the mastery of self is the discipline to do the right things despite of how we feel about them.

Then and Now of Love

It seems to take longer for people to find a mate theses days and I wonder if it’s in part due to people not being able to accept each other as much as they used to.

They say that times have change but do people live more fulfilling lives now or was it the case before?

If something wasn’t broken … then why change it?